Honestly,

Honestly, I am a failure.
I only finished Matthew. Really? The first day I read ch. 1-14. Just like I was "suppose" to... And it was so great.
But then somehow it took me 7 more freaking days to finish the 14 other chapters...
Honestly, I know that I am a sinner.
And man, I'm aware of that right now.
I can't even set aside like 45 minutes a day to "sacrifice, commit, whatever you want to call it" to read through the Gospels in 8 days as I prepare my heart for Lent? No, I can't. I didn't.
And I've read this other blog talking about how failing at Lent sacrifices is just as "great" as going through with them because it makes us aware of our current condition and just how badly we really need Jesus. Really need what He did on that cross.
I don't think I'm there yet. I mean, I know it. But I don't "believe" it.

So as I enter into the next 8 days of this new Lenten sacrifice of mine... I'm going to finish reading through the Gospels. Because I'm stubborn and I want to say that I did it. And I want to check them off. And because I want to prove to myself, God, I don't know who that I'm not a complete failure... Ugh.

*insert begging for forgiveness from a Heavenly Father who loves me more than I will ever comprehend. and thankfulness for the ultimate sacrifice. one I will never understand*