overwhelmed?

tonight's got me feeling pretty overwhelmed. 

trying to do it all. 

the never ending sink full of dirty dishes. 

all the joshua food in the fridge that i've yet to steam & cut up. 

manny's 13 work shirts that i still haven't ironed.

another night just me & the baby. 

blocks. turtles. toys. everywhere. 

that disgusting messy desk of mine. 

work. 

a floor that's never clean enough. 

and on. and on. and on. 

and just as i was standing there at the sink washing the billionth bottle for the day, wallowing in my selfishness...

the Lord just said, Kim- there is running water. flowing freely from this sink. every minute of everyday. you have more than 1 bottle. and money to feed that baby. you never have to worry about your baby going to be hungry. you make choices everyday that millions never have the opportunity to. you are so blessed. 

and in my selfishness and tears, i chose gratitude. 

it seems so simple.

but this sinful nature of mine often chooses selfishness.  

Lord, forgive of my selfishness. i need You. i can't and never will be able to "do it all" on my own. i pray for wisdom. i pray that everyday my heart matches yours more and more. break my heart for what breaks yours- not a sink full of dishes, but for millions of people starving and dying and sick. i pray that i see Your hand working in my life and rely completely on You in the big and the little. Lord, let my life shine for you. let my heart sing Your praises and my mouth confess Your truth. Lord, allow my to chose gratitude each and everyday. amen.

For the grace of God has appeared, bringing salvation to all men, instructing us to deny ungodliness and worldly desires and to live sensibly, righteously and godly in the present age,  looking for the blessed hope and the appearing of the glory of our great God and Savior, Christ Jesus, who gave Himself for us to redeem us from every lawless deed, and to purify for Himself a people for His own possession, zealous for good deeds.

titus 2: 11-14